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Am I the only one?

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Soon2beMrsFlick View Drop Down
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    Posted: 3/11/2006 at 3:01pm

just curious if this happens to anyone esle!

So, 3 or 4 times now people who were not going to be invited to the wedding have asked me what the date was, and made comments about they will mark it on their calendar and are excited!

I dont want to be rude, but what do you do/say to that!?

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bubbles View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bubbles Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/11/2006 at 3:11pm

Soontobe....I have had the same problem from a fellow collegue at work....she has invited herself three times to our wedding and what I have said is "although we would like to invite all our friends, we are limited in the number of seats in our venue. And our family has first priority"  I said it nicely and she wasn't offended....how can anyone argue with that?  All you are saying is that there is not enough room for EVERYONE!!!!!!!

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Beach_Meg View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Beach_Meg Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/11/2006 at 7:58pm
Had the same thing, but it was actually the husband of my colleague. I'm still
waiting for her to get upset once she notice that she's not invites, but I just
really didn't want to invite her since she is someone I know I will never see
again once one of us leaves their job. If she ever asks why she was not
invited, I will explain that we had to agree on only inviting those colleagues
that have initiated getting together outside from work as we have space
restrictions. Itís really not even a lieÖ

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PetesBride Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/11/2006 at 8:20pm

I am right there with you.  We are already way over 200 people and that is with an age limit.  We have some acquaintances that we see about every 4-5 months or so at social gatherings.  They seem to think that they will be invited to the wedding even though they have not received a save the date yet.  We have somehow avoided the topic by changing the subject, but I know that we will have to sit down and talk with them soon.  I just don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but this guest list is getting out of control.  I like the ideas the other girls had and I think I will be using one of them when this dreadful conversation comes up again.    Good luck!

 



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itsmars View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote itsmars Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/11/2006 at 9:25pm

i have a MAJOR issue with that! i usually say, "I'd love to, but my mom/dad/parents/FMIL has completely taken over the guest list!" or some of the things the other girls said.

for me, the even TOUGHER one is when my friends who already know they're invited say things like "I hope I find a date for you wedding!" or "Hmm.. I wonder who my date should be." Umm... SORRY, who said you could bring a date!?!?!?!

1 corinthians 13:4-7


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bubbles View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bubbles Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/11/2006 at 10:35pm
Hey Mars, do you know the etiquette for allowing guests to have dates/not????  I was wondering this myself!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Elizabeth&Pete Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/12/2006 at 10:50am
Happened to me too...I actually had someone email me two weeks before the wedding saying "oh, shoot I need to RSVP to your wedding for me and my boyfriend, when is it again?" and my response was uuummmmm, you're not invited?!?
I waited a couple of days trying to figure out if I would just add the two extra seats, but then got pissed. I mean, who does that???
So, i wrote her back a really nice email saying "thanks for your email, but space is really limited. We had to cut everyone who was not family and just a couple close friends that are actually in the wedding. Maybe we can get together after the wedding / honeymoon."

She wrote back and said she totally understood, since i had been going on about the list and keeping it down for a while.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote CajunGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/13/2006 at 10:55am
I just say, "we're trying to keep it as small as possible, and unfortunately we can't invite everyone we want.  Sorry!"  -> Insert smile and shrug of shoulders. 
Caroline

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Beach_Meg Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/13/2006 at 11:24am
Originally posted by bubbles bubbles wrote:

Hey Mars, do you know the etiquette for allowing
guests to have dates/not????† I was wondering this myself!


It's up to you to decide whether you want to invite them with guest
or not, but this is what we are doing.

For in town guest, if they have a partner, regardless of status and
how long they have been dating, we have invited them to bring their
partner. Only in one case is the partner someone that they have been
dating for less than half a year, so although they were not on the
initial guest list we are happy to include them (and we have met her
a few of times). BUT we have not invited our single guest to bring a
random date.

For our OOT guest, they are all invited to bring their partners and
those w/o a partner would have been welcome to bring a friend (so
they do not have to travel alone) but I don't think any single OOT
guest will be coming.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sonalid Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 3/13/2006 at 11:42am

Yeah, I work at a University and get a lot of comments from the students who are bold to ask the question, "Am I invited to your wedding?"  Um, no.  I simply say that we're trying to cut down our list to make room for family. 

We're doing exactly  what Beach_Meg is doing.  We're inviting in-town guests and their partners, and single guests will just have to come alone (unless they ask - nicely ).  The single guests will be seated with everyone they know anyway.  OOT guests are allowed to bring a date.

We're "laying down the law" by what we had printed on our RSVP cards:  "___ seat(s) have been reserved in your honor."

I've heard stories of the number changing to a larger number, so we're going to cross our fingers that this won't happen!

 

:: Admiral Baker Clubhouse ::
:: 08.20.06 ::


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